I’m waiting for a piece of paper. A piece of paper that will give me peace of mind. I’m supposed to fly to Brazil on Saturday, but I haven’t received my visa back yet. No passport, no visa, no Brazil. To be honest, I worry and am quite anxious about it.
While washing the dishes last night, I kept chewing over the problem in my head, getting more and more tense. I thought, “if only I had the visa right now, I wouldn’t be feeling so stressed. If only I had the visa, then I’d have peace of mind.” Honestly, I don’t need the visa today. Or tomorrow. I do need it by Friday. Whether or not it arrives today or Friday does not affect anything except my own peace of mind.
A piece of paper that will give me peace of mind.
Standing at the sink, I realized I wasn’t trusting God to take care of the situation and more importantly, I wasn’t resting on the Prince of Peace; I was waiting for a piece of paper. Yet again, I turn from the Creator God to the created thing. My golden calf is a visa.
In Mark 10, Jesus says, “ Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” I don’t believe. I’d rather harbor anxious thoughts than trust and belief in God to resolve my current problem. I pray, fearfully and without expectation or belief, that it will amount to anything.
God, may this not be! Forgive me and help me to believe and trust and obey.
What “piece of paper” is giving you peace of mind right now? What’s your idol?
Great post.
ReplyDeleteA professor of mine commented on the issue of trust one time. "He asked, 'What is the first thing you turn to in the morning? Is it the computer to check your e-mail or whatnot? Or do you open your Bible? I think this tells us what are faith really is in."
Your post is just another great example of how, though we think we are monotheistic, we have many other gods in our lives that we trust.
Matt,
ReplyDeleteYou are the first commenter here. Thanks.
I agree - what we turn to in good and bad times reflects where our hearts are focused and what we worship. I'm not always on God.