A butterfly called love

Love is a lot different in practice than in theory.  I thought I understood love, but understanding and doing are sometimes two mutually exclusive concepts.  I'm learning to love right now, sometimes to my joy, sometimes to my sorrow, and always to my discomfort.

I think loving a specific person, like a fiance, is difficult.  That love wants to grow and move from a cocoon to a butterfly.  It stretches, it tears, it hurts, it pushes and pulls and yearns to break out.  The prize is worth the effort.  The butterfly breaks free and is something bigger and more beautiful than before.  The caterpillar and cocoon were good for a time, but the butterfly is beautiful.

I feel stretched, pulled, and pushed, and hurt because I am learning to love.  Being a caterpillar was easy and fresh and new and exciting.  I don't know why it changed or how, but I'm in a cocoon right now.  I am learning how to love and how to speak a language of love that one will hear and understand.  My understanding of love won't suffice anymore; the goal is a butterfly and to get there, one must stretch and pull and push and tear through old ways of love to understand and love more beautifully.

The prize is worth the effort.