A few nights ago, I grabbed coffee with an old friend and we briefly talked about standards we have for the guys and girls that we date. She threw two Bible passages at me for the type of woman she wants to be (Proverbs 31) and the type of man she wants to marry (Psalm 15). I've heard the Proverbs 31 description before, but the Psalm 15 description was new to me. I think they are worthwhile suggestions for the type of man or woman you should strive to marry and be. I've pasted the two passages below.
A few thoughts:
- I don't know how anyone can read this part of Proverbs 31 and think that Christianity has an antiquated view of women. Christianity has always been and will be a champion of the diversity and equality of men and women.
- My desire for character in my future wife increases as I get older. I'd marry the woman in Proverbs 31.
- My favorite parts in Proverbs 31 are vss. 20, 25-26, and 28.
- Psalm 15 is convicting to me because I know that I still have a lifetime of pursuing righteousness, honesty, and good works ahead of me. I can't be THIS MAN before I'm married. Heck, I can't be this man on this side of God's fulfilled redemption plan. But, the pursuit of God is something worth chasing.
Truth be told, I've dated a girl who wasn't a Proverbs 31 woman and I wasn't a Psalm 15 man with her. There wasn't any happiness and right-ness to that relationship. If we set as a guideline these two passages, I think we may find more peace and joy in our relationships.
Psalm 15
1 LORD, who can dwell in Your tent? Who can live on Your holy mountain?
2 The one who lives honestly, practices righteousness,
and acknowledges the truth in his heart —
3 who does not slander with his tongue,
who does not harm his friend
or discredit his neighbor,
4 who despises the one rejected by the LORD,
but honors those who fear the LORD,
who keeps his word whatever the cost,
5 who does not lend his money at interest
or take a bribe against the innocent —
the one who does these things will never be moved.
Proverbs 31
10 Who can find a capable wife?
She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will not lack anything good.
12 She rewards him with good, not evil,
all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax
and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from far away.
15 She rises while it is still night
and provides food for her household
and portions for her servants.
16 She evaluates a field and buys it;
she plants a vineyard with her earnings.
17 She draws on her strength
and reveals that her arms are strong.
18 She sees that her profits are good,
and her lamp never goes out at night.
19 She extends her hands to the spinning staff,
and her hands hold the spindle.
20 Her hands reach out to the poor,
and she extends her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid for her household when it snows,
for all in her household are doubly clothed.
22 She makes her own bed coverings;
her clothing is fine linen
and purple.
23 Her husband is known at the city gates,
where he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes and sells linen garments;
she delivers belts to the merchants.
25 Strength
and honor are her clothing,
and she can laugh at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and loving instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the activities of her household
and is never idle.
28 Her sons rise up and call her blessed.
Her husband also praises her:
29 "Many women are capable,
but you surpass them all!"
30 Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting,
but a woman who fears the L
ORD will be praised.
31 Give her the reward of her labor,
and let her works praise her at the city gates.
