Feeling like giving up? Persevere, doggone it.

A part of me wants to give up on the things I'm doing and move on to the next stage of life.  It's a very small part and the other 96% of Joel Morgan won't let that part win.  I find that bothersome.  I don't know why I can't feel despondent or frustrated or down.  I want to, but I don't.  Rather, I feel like persevering.  I feel like finishing strong, even if I don't feel like doing all the work required to persevere.*

Monday morning, I read Job 1:21 in the Bible, which reads:  Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart.  The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.


I read it to give perspective to me before I interviewed for a job later that morning; I think of it now to remind myself to persevere.  No, I'm not Job.  Writing a thesis is not the same as losing one's entire family and fortune.  But it's a lesson that through all of life, good or bad, boring or exciting, may the name of the LORD be praised.  So, I'm going to Colossians 3:23 for the rest of this week and work hard.

Question/Answer
What's a struggle to persevere in right now?  Work, school, play?  Me - writing my thesis.



*I used "I" eight times in that paragraph.  I apologize.

How do you worship?

I’m reading through John right now and I’m on chapter 12.  The whole chapter shares contrasts proper worship to Jesus with sinful/wrong attitudes.  I want to highlight the first story in chapter 12.

Ch. 12 begins with a story of Mary washing Jesus’s feet with an expensive perfume.  Remember, washing a guest’s feet was a common practice on those days; anointing them with an expensive perfume was not.  Obviously, this is a story worth highlighting.  Judas’s response to her action was to criticize it, saying that the money should’ve been spent on the poor (taking his own percentage off the top, of course).  Like the expensive perfume covering Jesus’s stinky feet, Judas tries to cover up his stinky sin with a nice-smelling excuse.  Jesus’ words in verses 7 and 8 highlight her action and contrast it with Judas’s greedy objection.

“It was intended that she should save this perfume for the day of my burial.  You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me.”

This happens about 1 week prior to Jesus’s crucifixion and death and he understands this anointing as preparation for his coming burial.   I don’t know if Mary understands that Jesus will die soon or if she is simply honoring the one who raised her brother from the dead.  It is possible that Mary understands the significance of Jesus’s visit to Bethany (read 11:7-16 and 12:9-11) and is very thankful for his presence despite hostile opposition.  Regardless, she gives to Jesus a great honor with her simple, beautiful action.  Judas should recognize this.  Instead, his greed gets in the way of a special moment to honor Jesus.

I was going to write on the whole chapter, but then kept cutting it down to get to the point that convicted me the most in this first story: our sin gets in the way of proper worship of God.  I do this a lot and here is an example:  3 or 4 Sundays ago, I helped set up for Jacob’s Well.  I normally set up all the sound equipment (cords, mic’s, etc), but this Sunday, a friend of mine set it up.  After that, two people came up to me to play music with us; I had asked them to play, but forgot about it.  Lastly, I had neglected to pick songs because I assumed someone else was going choose music.  These three things stressed me out BIG.  I’m not a control freak, but I am a control freak.  So I was stressed out about where to put people, if the sound system was set up properly, and what we were going to sing.  During rehearsal, when I normally have a lot of fun and enjoy playing and singing and worshipping, I was pissed off.  Sinfully pissed off.  I wish I could say that I recognized it then, but it’s always in hindsight that I realize how my sinful attitudes or actions hinder a moment of glory to God.

Instead of offering sweet praise to Jesus for his death, eternal life, and forgiveness of sins, I tried to cover up my sinful attitude with music and silence.  It was wrong.  I was Judas.  I still am Judas.

Questions to consider:

How do you worship God?  

Do you often let sin affect your time with Jesus?

Favorite soda pop?

A Weekend in Review

I like what Chris Julian has done with his blog by posting pictures of events or interesting sights from Sao Paulo.  I'm going to steal that idea for Monday posts.

1.  Football with Matt Ystad.  It was the Vikings and it was Preseason, but it was FOOTBALL

2.  I ran on Sunday morning for the first time in months.  Woof.

3.  Skyping with Renato Betim, a good friend and brother from Sao Paulo.  Notice the matching glasses.

4.  Jacob's Well.  I LOVE my family here and I love playing music with this group.

5.  Romey and Peter!  2 of our 3 kids at JW!  They are an energetic handful. 

Back at it...

If I were worried about page views, then I would've been more consistent with this over the last two weeks.  But as it stands, life comes first.

Highlights of the last two weeks...

• Receiving my visa for travel to Brazil the day before leaving.  Definitely a lesson in faith and patience.
• Talking to college students in Sao Paolo  
• Giving free hugs on Av. Paulista two Monday nights ago
• Good food in Brazil
• Rice and beans - so simple, yet so very delicious
• Good friends in Brazil
• Renato, Chris and Melody and Michael and Rachel Julian, etc
• Worshipping with Brazilians in Portuguese.  That was super cool.
• Seeing how a missionary lives and works
• Seeing my Dad and brother in Minneapolis

Lowlights...

• Leaving Sao Paolo.  I didn't feel finished.

On a organizational note, I have a few topics that I've wanted to study but haven't had the motivation to do.  These include suffering and marriage/celibacy.  I think that I will also write up thoughts and questions I have/hear as I read through John with my friend, M.  

Questions for the faithful readers...

1. How have you seen God move in the past two weeks?
2. What conversations have you had (on faith or otherwise) that have made you think past the initial conversation?
3. Favorite ice cream?

St. Paul of the Brazilian Variety

"Hola, disculpa... voce falla ingles?  No fallu portugues."*

That's pretty much how I started a bunch of conversations today - "Hello, excuse me, do you speak English?  I don't speak Portuguese."  A couple of friends and I have been walking around Mackenzie University in Sao Paolo, Brazil, talking to students, and trying to connect them** to a local group of Christians***.  I enjoy it - the Brazilians are really friendly and open for a conversation, even missing the first portion of class to talk.  It's great.

A list of the good stuff so far:

• Beautiful Brazilians.  Duh
• Rice and beans
• Talking to people
• Riding a crowded bus
• Rice and beans
• Renato, my first Brazilian friend
• Chris, Melody, Rachel, and Michael Julian.  Superb people.
• Chris Julian - I could listen to him for hours.  And he's not just a talker; he's a doer
• Rice and beans
• Dave Disselkamp
• Talking to people
• Living with missionaries and learning what it's like here in Sao Paolo.
• Having a Brazilian friend tell me that he wants to live with and talk to Muslims too.  

It's not an exhaustive list, but a list nonetheless.  

Tchau.  Or "Belleza."  Or "Fallou."  Or "bye-bye."



*I really frackin' hate when Missionaries would come to a church and speak for 5 minutes in their language.  Really?  Good to know you've gone through language training.
**hopefully, Lord willing, someday
***Of the "We're living it abundantly" and "Jesus is good for all of us" variety.  Soooo, not the dorky kind.

Faith Like a Lions Fan

This is going to be a stream-of-conscious post – no forethought or planning outside of the title.

I wrote on Wednesday about faith in God to provide and I want to expound a little on a question I came up with:  Why do I have constant faith and love for the Detroit Lions, yet quickly turn away from God when our relationship requires faith?

The Detroit Lions are, as some may say, awful.  3 seasons ago, they set the record for the worst Win/Loss record in the NFL:  0-16.  Awful.  Despite their recent lack of success, I love them.  I tell people that I bleed Honolulu Blue and Silver (team colors).  It doesn’t matter if they lose – I believe and hope for success next week.  Hope springs eternal.

If the Lions, who have never failed to fail, keep my faith and hope, then why doesn’t God, who has never failed to provide, keep my faith and hope?  It isn’t like I have any reason to doubt him; in fact, I have many reasons to have faith in God:

• ·      Spring 2008 – My Mom was laid off from work
• ·      Fall 2008 – My Dad was laid off from work
• ·      February 20, 2009 – I had a $2,000 tuition payment due to school.  I didn’t have the money and my parent’s couldn’t help but my statement showed that it had been paid and I owed nothing.  $2,000 to $0.
• ·      Spring 2009 – Planning on going to grad school.  I got accepted everywhere I applied, invited to visit the University of Minnesota, and was offered complete funding.  That doesn’t happen often with Masters students.
• ·      Moving to Minnesota helped break apart a mutually destructive relationship and repair hurts between my parents and me.
• ·      An old family friend mentioned Jacob’s Well.  Though leery to join, I started going and soon developed a great friendship with Nate Ray.  I’ve never been more challenged to grow and learn and disciple and evangelize than at Jacob’s Well.
• And More....(friendships, my roommate, conversations, lessons learned from reading, etc)

And the latest?  My Passport/Visa arrived in the mail yesterday so that I can go on a Missions Trip to Sao Paolo, Brazil with 5 others from Jacob’s Well.  I have no doubt that this trip is in the center of God’s will – that he provided is evidence of that.

So why do I trust in the Lions but not in God?  I don’t know completely.  But what if we had the faith of a Lions fan?  Not a blind, naïve “confidence,” but a faith built on a loving relationship. What if we loved God even if his plan didn’t match ours?  What if we had faith?

I echo the words of the father whose son was demon-possessed:  “I believe, help my unbelief!”

Don't be anxious.

I’m waiting for a piece of paper.  A piece of paper that will give me peace of mind.  I’m supposed to fly to Brazil on Saturday, but I haven’t received my visa back yet.  No passport, no visa, no Brazil.  To be honest, I worry and am quite anxious about it.

While washing the dishes last night, I kept chewing over the problem in my head, getting more and more tense.  I thought, “if only I had the visa right now, I wouldn’t be feeling so stressed.  If only I had the visa, then I’d have peace of mind.”  Honestly, I don’t need the visa today.  Or tomorrow.  I do need it by Friday.  Whether or not it arrives today or Friday does not affect anything except my own peace of mind.

A piece of paper that will give me peace of mind.

Standing at the sink, I realized I wasn’t trusting God to take care of the situation and more importantly, I wasn’t resting on the Prince of Peace; I was waiting for a piece of paper.   Yet again, I turn from the Creator God to the created thing.  My golden calf is a visa.

In Mark 10, Jesus says, “ Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.”  I don’t believe.  I’d rather harbor anxious thoughts than trust and belief in God to resolve my current problem.  I pray, fearfully and without expectation or belief, that it will amount to anything. 

God, may this not be!  Forgive me and help me to believe and trust and obey.

What “piece of paper” is giving you peace of mind right now?  What’s your idol?

Adorning Grace with Goodness - Part 3

Titus Chapter 3

Paul uses the same pattern throughout his letter to Titus – a contrast of a good lifestyle to a bad lifestyle.  Examples include: Ch 1:5-9 against 1:10-16; Ch 2:1-13 against 2:14; Ch 3:1-2 and 4-8 against 3:3 and 9-11.  It’s interesting to me because I tend to be verbose and wordy and I say more than I need or should to relay an idea.  Paul here is brief, but redundant, with his description of the Godly life.

My favorite part in chapter 3 is verses 3-8.  Verse 3 tells of our pre-Christ life and verses 4-9 explain how the change from evil to Christ-like happens.

“But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy.”

Just like in chapter 2:11-14, Paul attributes the change in our lives to God’s work through his Spirit, made possible by his own life and death on earth.  It not new or groundbreaking exegesis, but it’s very affirming to me because these verses reveal the character of God.

God is righteous and holy.  We are foolish, disobedient, and enslaved to all sorts of passions and pleasures.  God is merciful and compassionate.  We live in malice, being hated and hating others.  God is kind and loving and he saved despite our obvious failure to be like him.  Even now, I still live with hatred and jealousy and pride, yet I have confidence that the God who saved me through Jesus the Messiah will continue to change me through the washing of rebirth and renewal by his Holy Spirit.

The letter to Titus is an affirmation of God’s character and a directive to move from knowledge of God’s character into a lifestyle of worship to God (Ch 3:8).  Our lifestyle of worship is a self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined person ready to do good works.